Home > Better Call Saul

Bali Ha'i

[SIGHS]

[GRUNTS]

MAN 1 [OVER TV]: Now you don't have to search the world for the perfect gift.

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...it's new Chia Pets.

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MAN 2: --call roll.

MAN 3: Mr. Okaka.

[INSTRUMENTAL "STAR-SPANGLED BANNER" PLAYING]

ANNOUNCER: --resident of a Sandpiper Crossing facility...

...or similar retirement community, you may be eligible to receive compensation.

Residents of some Sandpiper Crossing or similar retirement communities...

...may have been overcharged for goods and services.

In partnership with the law offices of Hamlin Hamlin & McGill...

...the law offices of Davis & Main are working to help those...

...who have been overcharged by their retirement communities.

For your free consultation...

...call Davis & Main at 505-242-7700.

That's 505-242-770....

[BREATHING DEEPLY]

[♪♪♪]

[SNIFFS]

[GRUNTS]

[CAR ALARM CHIRPS]

[♪♪♪]

[SPITS]

[PHONE RINGING]

KIM [ON RECORDING]: You've reached Kim Wexler. Please leave a message.

[MACHINE BEEPS]

JIMMY [OVER MACHINE]: ♪ Someday you'll see me ♪

♪ Floating in the sunshine ♪

♪ My head sticking out From a low flying cloud ♪

♪ You'll hear me call you ♪

♪ Singing through the sunshine ♪

♪ Sweet and clear as can be ♪

♪ Bali Ha'i will whisper ♪

♪ On the winds of the sea ♪

♪ Here am I, your special island ♪

♪ Come to me Come to me ♪

♪ Bali Ha'i ♪

♪ Bali Ha'i ♪

♪ Bali Ha'i ♪♪

[IN NORMAL VOICE] All right. There you go.

That completes our week-long tour of South Pacific.

You're welcome.

Tomorrow we began our exploration of the Carpenters catalog.

Of course, I am open to requests.

That's right, all you gotta do is call me.

Anytime. All right?

Bye. Call me.

Oh. Boundaries, Mrs. Nguyen. Boundaries.

Why are you here? You lose that job already?

I should be so lucky.

You don't like your job? Boo-hoo. Poor baby.

You know, some people work for a living.

No one gives us free cars.

-So why you here? -This place is paid up.

I'm within my rights as your tenant. That's all you need to know.

Do I smell coffee? Have you got a pot on?

Why?

How about a fill up?

You can afford to buy your own.

The faster I get coffee, the faster I'm out of here.

[SPEAKING IN VIETNAMESE]

Chào các cô, ladies.

[CAR ALARM CHIRPS]

Son of a--

Ugh.

-You haven't unpacked yet? -Uh....

Kevin and Paige are here.

Absolutely.

[PEOPLE CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY]

I don't know exactly what Chuck may have said to you.

But just so you know, I did not ask him to step in on my behalf.

Hi, guys. Sorry for the wait.

-Not a problem. -Hi.

Wonderful to see you.

-Howard. HOWARD: Kevin.

KIM: Good to see you two. Hi, Paige. Hi, Kevin.

-Great to see you. -Please have a seat.

PAIGE: Thank you. HOWARD: Kevin, how's your grandson?

KEVIN: Out of control, running circles around us.

[EXHALES]

[ENGINE STOPS]

Hello.

Can I help you?

You know why I'm here?

He needs an answer.

[SIGHS]

Respectfully, I'm gonna have to say no.

You sure about that?

I am.

[DOOR SLAMS]

[MIKE SIGHS]

[OPENING BAGS]

Your Honor, the defense has made the very reasonable request that...

...the plaintiffs produce their medical records or, barring that...

...a signed release so we can examine the records ourselves.

Your Honor, our client's medical records have no bearing on this case.

Medical records are plainly relevant as they bear directly on our contention...

...the plaintiffs are not adequate class representatives.

KIM: This is a transparent attempt at intimidation. Nothing more.

How so?

Many of our clients have information in their records they prefer to keep private.

They're fearful at the thought of strangers poking in their personal files.

By forcing them to reveal this information...

...the defense is banking on them dropping out of the case.

Your Honor, this is about class certification, that's all.

If the plaintiffs are suffering from dementia or other mental deficiencies--

You saying they're incompetent?

We have the right to any record that speaks to their competency as regards--

It seems the defense wants it both ways then.

If our clients are suffering from dementia...

...the contracts they signed weren't entered into knowingly.

REESE: No. That is not-- KIM: The defense wants to claim...

...their residents are competent enough to be held to contracts...

...but too incompetent to sue. So which is it?

Many of the residents signed their contracts years ago.

And at the time, they were perfectly competent.

But that can change.

Especially when we're talking about elderly individuals.

Or Sandpiper preyed on incompetent seniors and bilked them out of money.

Ms. Wexler.

I am simply trying to defend our clients from bullying by the defense.

Your Honor, as stated in the brief in front of you...

...this is a standard request granted in every case of its kind.

This is not about bullying.

Granting this invasion of privacy allows our clients to be doubly victimized.

I ask that you deny the defense's motion, Your Honor.

I'm leaning toward granting the motion...

...but I would like to review the pleadings and briefs again.

I'll have my decision for you shortly.

Adjourned.

I'm gonna meet you back at the office.

Ms. Wexler. Hey.

I just wanted to say good work in there.

Thanks, but I'm pretty sure I lost.

Of course. It's an unwinnable position.

That's why your boss didn't bother showing up.

But you went down swinging, and I admire that.

Thank you.

What are you doing for lunch?

Um, probably just grabbing something from the vending machines.

Oof. We can do better than that.

-Mr. Schweikart, good to see you. -How are you doing?

Very well. Can I get drinks for you two? Your usual Moscow Mule?

Absolutely. You want one?

Best Moscow Mule in the city.

Fresh ginger, real copper mug, the works.

That's very vintage, but I'm good. Just an iced tea.

Ah.... You sure?

I'll be the sole degenerate who's drinking in the middle of a workday.

That too is vintage.

I'll get those started.

So you've been with HHM, what, ten years?

Uh....

-Yeah. Last August. -And you started in the mailroom?

I did. I was six years there. How did you know that?

Oh, I asked around. It's a small town.

It sounds like you certainly paid your dues.

I was very fortunate. HHM put me through law school while I worked.

That's great they foster talent. I imagine you're paying it off as part of your deal?

Yeah, happily. It's a pretty standard arrangement.

I have to say, watching you in court today...

...it sure did bring back some old memories for me.

-One in particular, anyway. -Yeah?

I was a year out of law school at this firm in Boston.

I was finally put on my first big case, this huge employment discrimination suit.

That thing kept us in billing for a decade.

Anyway, we landed this monster.

And I find out I'm second chair to one of the partners on the preliminary hearing.

And I think, "This is it. This is what will define the rest of my career."

So the hearing's getting closer and closer.

I even get this new suit I can't afford. I split it over three credit cards.

I'm probably still paying it off to this day.

Heh. So I go in bright and early.

I'm wearing my new suit, prepping my table, and in walks the opposing counsel.

There's four of them.

One senior partner and three high-level associates.

These guys have been litigating longer than I've been alive.

But I think, mm-mm. Mm.

"I'm good. I got my boss coming. It'll be fine."

So I'm sitting alone at my table waiting for my boss to show.

And I'm waiting.

And I'm waiting. And then suddenly, they're calling us to order.

And I realize that no one from my firm is coming. It's just me.

So I think, "All right, then. This is the moment."

And I get up there and I argue like my life depended on it.

I'm sweating and I'm citing statutes left and right.

And I'm doing okay, respectable.

But I'm just a BB gun to these four howitzers.

And I lose, of course.

It was inevitable.

But later it hit me that my boss never intended to show.

And they all laughed about it.

They patted me on the back, said it was my trial by fire. And I laughed with them.

But, you know, it never really sat well with me.

You want them to have your back.

Because at the end of the day, it wasn't about proving my mettle.

My boss had a tee time that he didn't wanna miss.

I wasn't there long.

Could I ask why we are here?

[KIM CLEARS THROAT]

You know, I've had my eye on you for a while.

Since that Kettleman thing. It was an excellent deal you got for him.

And I'm wondering why someone who can put together a deal like that...

...is arguing a losing position with no backup.

I have no complaints about HHM.

That's great.

However, if on the off chance that you're pondering a change...

...Schweikart & Cokely would be happy to put your talents to good use.

We'd have to have a more formal meeting, work out specifics.

But we think you would be a great fit.

Well, I'm flattered...

...but there's clearly an ethical issue here.

Well, of course we'd take you off Sandpiper.

Rest assured, we wouldn't be expecting any information about HHM's strategy.

Look, we're a large, diversified firm.

And just think what you can do with our resources...

...and the freedom to really spread your wings.

That's....

I owe a lot to HHM.

Your tuition debt? We could take care of that.

That's very generous.

Well, give it some time to think about it. You give me a call...

...and we'll set up a meeting with the rest of the senior partners.

And to be clear...

...we're talking partner track.

Jesus, Sean. What, did you have to send to Moscow?

Sorry for the wait, Mr. Schweikart.

Are we ready to order?

[♪♪♪]

[OVER TV] --here for the Gourmet Quick Chop.

It's the fastest, easiest and safest way...

...to chop, mince or dice any vegetable, guaranteed.

Here's how it works. Just place the vegetable on the board...

...give it a tap. You've got finely shredded cabbage in seconds...

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It even works on your toughest vegetables, like potatoes.

Make home fries with just one tap.

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One tap, and you've got sliced onions for burgers.

A few more taps, and you've got....

-What's the message? -Take the 5000.

It took two guys to tell me that?

[TV CONTINUES PLAYING]

We were just supposed to scare you, that's all.

Well, try harder next time. Get out.

Almonds, walnuts, pecans. Quick Chop even has the muscle to crack ice.

MIKE: Get out.

Call now and you'll get Quick Chop for 19.99. But that's not all.

We'll also include the Grater and the Gripper free.

Remove the blades and it instantly converts into....

[TV TURNS OFF]

[BULLET CLATTERS]

[SIGHS]

[PHONES RINGING]

[KNOCK ON DOOR]

Oh, hey, Julie. Come on in.

-I've got those Sandpiper documents. -Great, just put them anywhere.

Howard asked if you could go through them now.

It's 1:15. I was just about to grab lunch.

Yeah, he needs them done by 2:30 so he can draft a letter.

I brought these. Figured I could petty-cash a lunch order for you.

I got Accounting to approve that new fancy salad place.

Kaylee. Kaylee, come on, not too far from the side.

Throw the ball, Pop Pop.

[CHUCKLES]

When are we going home?

What, you don't like it here?

-It's okay. -It's okay?

You got a pool, what more do you want?

-I guess. -You guess?

You guess? Well, you wanna come out of there?

No, I'm staying.

You want me to come in there and get you?

I can't have you in a pool that's only okay.

It's good, it's good.

[MIKE LAUGHS]

-You sure? You sure? -I'm sure.

Kaylee, honey, it's time to come out now.

Just a few more minutes.

No, you do what Pop Pop says.

Come on, baby. Before you turn into a prune.

[PIANO MUSIC PLAYING]

[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]

[SIGHS]

Miss? The gentleman would like me to let you know, your next drink is on him.

Let me know when you're ready.

I'm ready.

Wasn't sure that was gonna work.

[CHUCKLES]

Don't tell me that's the first time you've done that.

So, what kind of return on investment...

-...are you getting on these drinks? -Mm.

None as pretty as you.

Oh, man.

[BOTH CHUCKLING]

I'm Dale, by the way.

Giselle.

[PEOPLE CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY]

Okay, item number 44. What do we have?

[SIGHS]

Residency contract for Abigail Hildreth.

Abigail Hildreth.

And what's the date on that?

Dated August 1st, 1999.

August 1st, 1999.

August 1st, 1999.

And do we have the corresponding deposition for Mrs. Hildreth?

Yes.

[ERIN CLEARS THROAT]

Have you ever heard the expression "a watched pot never boils"?

Oh.

Here it is.

Thank you. See?

I've got her down as item 12. Date of depo, September 15th.

September 15th. 15th of September.

-September 15th. -Or-- Yeah, September 15th.

Thank you. Okay, item number 45.

[CELL PHONE BUZZING]

ERIN: Jimmy.

It's my grandma. She's old.

Be right back.

Kim?

KIM: How fast can you get downtown?

-Santa Fe downtown? -Albuquerque.

-Why? -I'm at the bar at Forque...

...and I've got a live one on the hook.

I'm on my way. What's the shot?

DALE: Two or three. KIM: You don't think they do?

DALE: No. Well, no. KIM: They could. Ha-ha-ha.

DALE: I know, but they don't have to because we get it.

KIM: That's possible but I don't understand why that's an issue.

-You can always go back. DALE: Yeah, yeah.

Oh, Viktor. There you are.

So sorry I'm late. I had to put out a few fires.

No problem. I made a new friend. Dale, my brother, Viktor.

-How you doing? -Nice to meet you, Dale.

-Thanks for keeping sis company. -My pleasure.

You need a drink. Let's get you a drink.

-So, what do you do, Dale? -I'm an engineer.

What, like Casey Jones with a hat?

No, idiot, an "engineer" engineer. Not an engineer. Dale builds things.

I design things. Spillways and drainage fields mostly.

I don't actually build them.

Well, that's cool, yeah.

You could still wear the hat though, right?

-I mean, nothing stopping you. -Yeah, I guess I could.

There's no rule about that...

-...as far as I know. -You're a brat. Why the good mood?

Did it go well today?

Please tell me it went well.

Yeah. It went well.

Very well? Like... very, very?

Beyond our wildest.... Yeah.

[LAUGHS]

Whoo! Ha-ha.

-How many of these has she had? -I am just getting started, baby. Ha-ha.

Remember these faces, Dale. They'll be on the cover of Fortune magazine.

-Giselle, please. -No, Dale's a good guy.

-Yeah, but you're boring the man. -No, no, no, not really.

Thank you.

All right, I am off to the little girls' room.

Say only nice things about me while I'm gone. Okay?

[SIGHS]

She's something.

Yeah.

So Giselle was telling me you two are starting a business.

What exactly did she tell you?

Oh, nothing much. Just something about a dot-com.

Some way for people to hook up with each other using the Internet.

Look, I'm sure you're a nice guy, but she's talking out of school.

-We're-- We're full up on this thing. -Oh, okay.

We sign one more investor, we gotta go public. And I'm just....

No. We cannot take anyone else on.

-No offense. -Oh. It's okay, yeah.

No worries.

Spread your arms.

TIO [IN SPANISH]: He wearing a wire?

NACHO: No.

[IN SPANISH] No wire, but....

[IN ENGLISH] He's got a gun.

[IN ENGLISH] I don't care about the gun.

Tomorrow, you go to the district attorney...

...and you explain to him that my nephew's gun was yours.

The DA will ask you why you didn't say anything before.

You tell him you forgot, you were rattled...

...make up anything you want. I don't give a shit.

But it's your gun.

Let's discuss my payment.

That time has passed. No 5000 for you.

The price is 50.

How about your payment is you get to leave?

Not enough.

Oh, you think you can negotiate with me?

I say the word, my nephews go to a certain motel...

...pay a visit to your daughter-in-law and your little granddaughter.

What do you think happens then?

Consider your position carefully.

I get my money...

...or neither of us walk out of here.

You're willing to die for this?

Maybe I need the 50,000 more than you do.

[LAUGHS]

[IN SPANISH] I told you, right? Giant balls.

[IN ENGLISH] How you manage to live so long with a mouth like that?

Hmm?

Fifty thousand.

And the gun is yours.

[CAR APPROACHING]

[CAR DOOR OPENS]

[CAR DOOR SHUTS]

-He sent you? -I volunteered.

Only safe way for us to talk.

You really pushed it in there.

That thing we did?

He finds out, we're both dead.

You get that, right?

What thing we did?

-What's this? -Twenty-five thousand.

-What for? -We made a deal.

I didn't hold up my end.

Your problem is coming back sooner than we expected.

You gonna cash that? I might know a guy who can help.

It's better as a souvenir.

I figured you'd be maybe, I don't know...

...a touch happier this morning.

-Maybe a smidge, possibly? -I am.

I'm totally happy.

Why wouldn't I be?

I, uh....

I had a job offer.

Really? From where?

Schweikart & Cokely.

Seriously?

Rich Schweikart said they would even pay off my law school loans.

That's great.

Please let me be there when you tell Howard. Please.

So why the sad puppy eyes? What, you don't want that job?

No, no, of course I do. I mean, who wouldn't, right?

It's a huge firm, you get out from under Howard's thumb.

Right. Exactly.

Besides, HHM is looking more and more like a dead-end for me anyway.

Exactly. So, what's the problem?

I just....

[CHUCKLES]

I don't know.

I keep thinking of you floating in that pool.

You knew what you wanted...

...but I got in the way.

What are you talking about?

You took the Davis & Main job because of me.

I took that job because it was the right decision.

A steady paycheck? Done.

A place to live that's more than, oh, five square feet? Boom.

A car that's all one color? Nailed it.

-Heh. -I'm good. I got what I wanted.

And you with the Schweikart thing?

You could have everything you ever wanted.

What's not to love about that?

Yeah.

What's not to love?

[CAR ALARM CHIRPS]

[CAR ALARM CHIRPS]

[ENGINE STARTS]

[SIGHS]

[STARTS ENGINE]

[♪♪♪]