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Captain's Holiday

( people talking, laughing )

( birds singing )

COMPUTER: Welcome to Risa.

All that is ours is yours.

We are looking for the lodging chamber of Captain Jean-Luc Picard.

A file scan reveals no record of a Captain Picard currently visiting Risa.

When is he expected to arrive?

There is no arrival date on file for any such individual.

Could we have been mistaken?

He will come.

RIKER: First Officer's Log, Stardate 43745.2.

We have departed Gemaris V where, for the past two weeks

Captain Picard has been serving as mediator

in a trade dispute between the Gemarians

and their nearest neighbor, the Dachlyds.

Welcome back, Deanna.

It's good to be back.

The last two weeks have been grueling.

I take it the Captain was able to negotiate an agreement mutually beneficial to both parties.

He was.

I don't know how he managed it.

The Gemarians and the Dachlyds are both incredibly stubborn people.

The more difficult the task, the sweeter the victory.

Go to warp four, Mr. Bennett.

Set course for Starbase 12.

Report.

Everything's status quo, sir.

Very well.

If, um... anyone needs me, I'll be in my ready room.

Sir?

Congratulations.

About what?

About the trade agreement.

( grunts )

Is it my imagination or is something bothering the Captain?

He has been under a great deal of strain lately.

While we were on Gemaris, he ate sparingly and slept even less.

Anything we can do?

Actually, I have a solution in mind but I doubt he'll agree to it.

What would that be?

Our Captain needs a vacation.

Space, the final frontier.

These are the voyages of the Starship Enterprise.

Its continuing mission--

to explore strange new worlds

to seek out new life and new civilizations

to boldly go where no one has gone before.

( door chimes )

( door chimes )

Come!

Sir, it's been brought to my attention that one of the crew is neglecting his health again.

How so?

It's a classic case of stress-related ailments brought on by overwork-- exhaustion, irritability, muscle spasms.

Yet he insists on ignoring it.

It doesn't sound too serious.

And I plan on keeping it that way.

What's the treatment?

A week's shore leave.

Oh... impossible.

Jean-Luc, I could make that an order.

But you won't.

Oh, Beverly, you know I loathe vacations.

You loathe going on vacations.

Once you're there, you have a marvelous time.

Why, you told me that your four days on Zytchin III were wonderful.

I lied.

Look... the Enterprise is scheduled to spend a week undergoing maintenance overhaul at Starbase 12.

While there, I promise that I will make full use of available recreational activity.

Watching some technician fill deuterium tanks is not my idea of fun.

I suppose I could find a few hours to spend on the holodeck.

Oh, forget the holodeck.

Isn't there someplace special you want to go?

The Astrophysics Center on Icor IX is holding a symposium on rogue star clusters.

I had given serious thought to attending.

The last thing you need is serious thought.

Jean-Luc, why don't you go someplace beautiful where you can relax and be pampered?

You deserve it.

I'll give it serious thought.

Captain...

Doctor... enough.

So, have you decided where you're going yet?

Yes, I have, Number One. Bridge.

No, I meant on your shore leave. Not you, too.

Halt. I know this perfect little vacation spot.

In fact, it falls within the coordinates of this sector.

How convenient, except, Number One

I have absolutely no intention of taking a holiday.

Is that clear? Very clear.

Good. I'm glad we got that straightened out. Resume.

The place is called Risa and believe me, Captain, it is a paradise.

Warm tropical breezes, exotic foods nothing to do but sit around all day, enjoy the quiet and then... the women. The women. Of course.

I'm sure you would find their sybaritic outlook on life very appealing.

Oh, I'm sure.

I'm glad to hear you say so, sir.

Unfortunately, this vessel is about to undergo extensive repairs requiring my personal supervision.

What about Risa?

Some other time, Number One.

Will, I just had some terrific news.

Really?

There's an excellent chance that my mother may be joining us on Starbase 12.

Your mother?

She's returning home from a conference on Achrady VII and she's going to try to rearrange her schedule so she can spend some time visiting with us.

That's wonderful, Deanna.

She mentioned how much she was looking forward to seeing you again, Captain.

Did she?

Commander, could I have a word with you?

Is something wrong, Captain?

Tell me, Number One.

Is the entire crew aware of this little scheme to send me off on holiday?

I believe there are two ensigns stationed on deck 39 who know nothing about it.

I suppose this means I can look forward to a week of continual harassment on this subject?

( sighs )

I admit I have been feeling a little fatigued.

I'll see to it that these bags are beamed directly to your room, sir.

You look very handsome, if I might say so, Captain.

Are you taking all these books?

I thought I'd take some light reading in case I got bored.

Ulysses by James Joyce?

Ethics, Sophistry and the Alternate Universe.

Ving Kuda-- you call that light reading?

To each his own, Number One.

Have I mentioned how imaginative the Risian women are, sir?

Too often, Commander.

I do have one request, sir.

You want me to bring you back a souvenir?

It's called a Horga'hn.

I don't think you'll have any trouble finding one.

Consider it done.

Captain, I would feel better if you would allow me to assign a security officer to you.

We will be out of communication range when we leave orbit.

( sighs )

I really don't think that will be necessary, Mr. Worf.

Risa has a reputation of being a most peaceful planet.

Aye, sir.

Well, the ship is yours, Number One.

Enjoy your trip, Captain.

I'll try, Counselor.

He's going to have a great time.

( people talking, laughing )

( birds singing )

Oh... I beg your pardon.

God, it's so good to see you again.

I think you've mistaken me for someone else.

You know, I think you might be right.

Welcome to Risa.

A simple handshake would have sufficed.

( woman laughing )

( women squealing with laughter )

( people talking, laughing )

( sighs )

( ball humming )

( humming )

WOMAN: Return.

My apologies.

I fear I have yet to master the art of hoverball.

So it would seem.

My name is Joval.

I'm employed here.

Is there anything you require to make your stay a more pleasant one?

You find me amusing.

No.

It's just that you are the fifth woman to ask me that question this morning.

All I require is to sit in the sun, read my book... alone.

And afterward?

I really hadn't thought that far ahead.

Then, may I suggest a swim, followed by a massage.

Some other time, perhaps.

I don't understand.

You say you wish to be alone yet, you carry the Horga'hn.

Well, I just purchased it.

Why?

Are you implying this has some special meaning?

The Horga'hn is the Risian symbol of sexuality.

To own one is to call forth its powers.

To display it is to announce you are seeking jamaharon.

Riker.

Do you seek jamaharon?

I don't even know what it means.

The Horga'hn is for a friend.

I see. Someone close to you.

That's right.

Someone you love.

I wouldn't go that far.

Well, your attitude is most puzzling.

I will leave you now to your book.

That is all I ask.

You're blocking the suns.

I know you're working with her.

I warn you, it's a mistake.

Are you addressing me?

Don't bother to deny it.

I've seen the two of you together.

I don't know what the devil you're talking about.

But, whatever it is, I assure you, it's no concern of mine.

Tell her I want the disk returned to me immediately.

Perhaps I have not made myself clear.

You have the wrong man.

I am rapidly losing patience with you.

I demand you talk business.

You'll find Ferengi demands carry little weight with me.

Obviously, you've never dealt with my people before.

( chuckles )

On the contrary. All too often.

Then, you know the Ferengi are not to be trifled with.

Or trusted.

You dare to insult me?!

I advise you to listen closely, for I will not say this again.

I came to Risa for a holiday, nothing more.

I have no knowledge of this woman of whom you speak nor have I set eyes on any disk.

( laughs )

You expect me to believe such feeble lies?

I don't care what you believe!

This is not over yet, human.

The disk is mine!

And so is the woman.

Remember that.

WOMAN: Hello.

Oh, it's you.

Well, that's not much of a greeting.

Look, I don't wish to appear rude but I am not seeking jamaharon.

All right.

But you really should try it sometime.

If I try it it will be at a time of my own choosing.

That's fine with me.

It's not as though I was offering to help you find it.

Uh... I, uh...

I assumed that because of the way you welcomed me the other day...

I'm sorry if I embarrassed you.

I don't recall saying I was embarrassed.

It's just that I prefer to be acquainted with the women that I kiss.

That's understandable.

The name's Vash.

Jean-Luc Picard.

So tell me about yourself, Jean-Luc.

( sighs heavily )

Would you rather I guess?

I can be very persistent.

I'm the Captain of a Federation starship.

Oh...

That explains it.

Explains what?

I noticed you arguing with that Ferengi.

For a moment there it looked like it was going to come to blows.

You're the woman he was talking about.

I hope your disagreement wasn't over me.

For that information, you'll have to ask him.

Where are you going?

To find some privacy. Wait a second.

What did he tell you? I bet there wasn't a bit of truth to it.

And you said you didn't know her.

I don't. And I don't want to.

Return the disk to me and all will be forgiven.

The disk doesn't belong to you, Sovak-- it never did.

It would seem the two of you have a lot to discuss.

If you will excuse me.

Jean-Luc, I'm sorry.

Perhaps I could explain all this to you later?

Perhaps you can.

I have a proposal

I believe you'll find most interesting.

Save your breath.

I'm willing to pay you your weight in gold in exchange for the disk.

Is that not a generous offer?

Oh... I must have that woman.

What the hell are you doing in my room?

We are Vorgons.

I am Ajur.

This is Boratus.

We come from the 27th century.

We traveled 300 years into the past to find you.

All right, let's assume for the moment that I believe you.

That you are, indeed, from the future.

What is it you want from me?

Have you heard of the Tox Uthat?

What?

I'm aware of the legend.

It tells of a visitor... from the future who left behind a mysterious device known as the Tox Uthat.

Essentially that story is correct.

Then the Uthat actually exists?

Yes. It was invented by a scientist named Kal Dano in the mid-27th century.

The Uthat is a quantum phase inhibitor capable of halting all nuclear reaction within a star.

But... why bring such a powerful weapon into the past?

Criminals attempted to steal the device so he fled back to the 22nd century, where he hid it.

Ajur and I were the security team assigned to retrieve the Uthat.

I gather you were unsuccessful.

Yes. When we returned we began to search through the historical records for some clue to the Uthat's fate.

And your search led you to me?

We came upon a brief account stating that you had discovered an object of unknown origin while vacationing in Risa.

From its description-- a crystal fitting into the palm of the hand-- we surmised it could very well be the Tox Uthat.

Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you but I haven't found anything, including peace which is the only thing I'm looking for.

You will find such a device, Captain.

To us, it is already part of history.

And, uh, if I find it, what then?

You will give it to us immediately so that we may return with it.

Well, the Uthat belongs to your time, not mine.

( buzzing whir )

May I come in?

Excuse the mess.

Sovak has taken to searching my room periodically.

This what he's looking for?

I'm sorry I had to hide it like that.

I was afraid he'd start searching me next.

This disk must contain some very valuable information.

Well, I doubt it's anything you'd be interested in.

Depends.

On what?

On whether or not it has something to do with the Tox Uthat.

Did Sovak tell you that?

Well, let's just say

I've heard... rumors that the Uthat is located somewhere on Risa.

Look, the last thing I need is a partner.

So it's true.

Have a seat.

I don't suppose you ever heard of Professor Samuel Estragon?

Yes, as a matter of fact, I have.

He spent half his life searching for the Tox Uthat.

I served as his personal assistant for the past five years.

Shortly before he died, he uncovered new data pinpointing its location and that disk contains his research notes and maps.

And you're continuing his work.

Exactly.

With a Ferengi as an associate?

Sovak and I definitely are not working together.

But the two of you are... very well acquainted.

Well, at times he aided the professor in his explorations.

Especially in situations that weren't quite ethical.

And now with typical Ferengi logic he's convinced that the Tox Uthat belongs to him.

All he cares about is selling it to the highest bidder.

Whereas you, of course, have a nobler purpose in mind.

I told the professor I'd present it to the Daystrom Institute for study.

Ah.

But, first, I have to find it and that won't be easy with Sovak watching me every minute.

I'll go in your place.

And what about me?

You remain here.

It's safer.

Is that an order?

Absolutely.

This isn't a starship, Jean-Luc.

I don't follow orders.

Oh, I see.

Besides, you'd never find it without me.

The professor's notes are in code.

From the moment I met you

I knew you were going to be trouble.

You look like a man who could handle trouble.

So, where exactly is the location?

It's about 27 kilometers due east.

There's some subterranean caves there.

That's where you'll find the Uthat.

I'll meet you in the lobby in 15 minutes.

Be punctual.

Oh, and, uh, I advise you to change your clothing.

Jean-Luc?

We're going to make a wonderful team.

( people talking, laughing )

( birds singing )

I expected such treachery.

Did you think you could sneak away from me so easily?

The disk-- where is it?

Didn't anyone tell you weapons aren't allowed on Risa?

You're making a grave mistake putting your trust in this woman.

It would be a worse mistake to trust you.

Silence!

Do you know how she acquired the disk in the first place?

Sovak!

( laughing )

I paid her to steal it.

But instead, she betrayed me and used my money to make her way here.

It didn't happen that way.

She's a greedy and unscrupulous woman.

( sighing )

A perfect mate for a Ferengi.

You're becoming quite annoying, Sovak.

As are you, human.

Perhaps I should kill you and then take the disk.

No, wait.

You can have it.

See, I told you we'd make a wonderful team.

We've got a long trip.

( device beeping )

Have you calculated how much further we have to go?

Another 11 kilometers.

We should stay here for the night.

I was hoping you'd say that.

Actually, we've... we've made better time than I expected.

Well, I'll take that as a compliment.

As it was intended.

( sighs )

Jean-Luc...

I'm afraid I haven't been completely honest with you.

Forgive me if I don't act surprised.

Sovak did pay me to hand over the disk.

So you did steal it.

It wasn't stealing.

The professor had died.

I had already spent five years of my life tracking down the Uthat.

But you took Sovak's money.

It was the only way I could afford to get to Risa.

As for Sovak, he got exactly what he deserved.

Well, any woman who can beat a Ferengi at his own game bears watching.

I'll take that as another compliment.

I'm flattered.

Hmm. Well... we should get some sleep.

You know, Jean-Luc, it's lucky for you we met.

If it wasn't for me...

If it wasn't for me you'd still be back there sitting in the sun, relaxing.

That happens to be why I came to Risa.

I'm sure you hated every minute of it.

That kind of vacation isn't for a man like you.

You need excitement.

Excitement?

Spending the night in a damp cave chasing after something we shall probably never find?

You're enjoying yourself, aren't you?

Ah.

Yes.

I just wanted to hear you say it.

Good, now let's get some sleep.

( chuckles )

I'll never forget that look on your face when you thought I was offering you jamaharon.

Now, that was a simple misunderstanding.

Oh.

( sighs )

You did seem a little disappointed when I turned you down.

( chuckling )

You are outrageous.

Thank you.

You're pretty stimulating yourself.

Don't you see?

We're a lot alike.

That's probably why we get along so well.

You call this getting along?

Fine.

We don't get along. We're not getting along.

I didn't say that.

No, no. If you want to believe that we're not getting along that's all right with me...

You still think I'm trouble?

I'm sure of it.

( device beeping )

VASH: This is it.

We've reached the end of our journey.

( beeping )

Do you have the exact location?

Seven meters from the opening, along the wall.

That should make it about here.

( beeping louder )

What the...?!

Is something wrong?

( sighs )

I can't get a reading on this.

There must be Starithium ore in these rocks.

And that leaves us but one alternative.

Shall we?

Picard!

A little premature, aren't we?

We are to be a witness to a great moment, Picard.

Who the hell are they?

They are... security officers from the 27th century.

They're here to take back the Uthat.

You knew about this and didn't say anything?

I'm sorry, Vash.

Would you have brought me here if I had told you?

Probably not.

My point exactly.

SOVAK: So, the betrayer is herself betrayed.

Well, you've put together quite a little team.

Do not interrupt the Captain.

SOVAK: Quiet!

PICARD: How did you get here?

SOVAK: I found the disk in her room.

That's impossible.

I made a copy as a precaution but I burned it before we left.

Ah... only the outer casing was incinerated.

Now, I had no intention of interrupting you.

Please, continue digging!

( laughing )

( grunting )

No one told you to stop digging, human.

I see no reason to continue.

You will do as I say.

Look about you, Sovak.

By now it must be obvious, even to you.

The Uthat is not here.

( Sovak cackling )

Is this some pathetic attempt at trickery?

Of course, it's here.

We simply haven't found it yet.

Are you saying that the professor's findings were wrong?

It would appear so.

But how can that be?

His evidence was overwhelming.

Enough with this foolishness!

Can't you see he's trying to deceive us?

Return to work this instant.

I'm afraid he's right, Sovak.

According to the disk, we should have reached it hours ago.

Lies!

Treachery!

This cannot be happening.

Not another failure.

Not after having come so close.

It is most puzzling.

( buzzing whir )

It's over, Sovak.

No, I will not be cheated out of my prize.

Tell him!

Tell him the professor's research is irrefutable.

I don't know anymore.

Then step aside.

The Uthat is here, somewhere.

It's just waiting to be found.

It can't hide from me forever.

( panting )

Five years of my life wasted.

There will be other treasures to be found, Vash.

Not like the Uthat.

I hope you won't mind, but, um...

I need to be alone.

( birds calling )

RIKER: Enterprise to Captain Picard.

Picard here.

Go ahead, Commander.

We hope we're not interrupting anything important, Captain but we wanted to inform you that we have achieved orbit around Risa and we're ready to beam you aboard at your convenience.

I'll be returning shortly, Commander.

In the interim, stand ready to initiate Transporter Code 14 at my signal.

Transporter Code 14?

You heard me, Number One.

Yes, sir.

Picard out.

PICARD: Leaving so soon?

Jean-Luc.

I was just about to come say good-bye.

Well, then... I've saved you the bother.

I want to put this all behind me as soon as possible.

You understand?

Of course.

There's just one last thing you can do for me.

Anything.

Tell me where you've hidden the Tox Uthat.

That's not funny.

You never intended to burn that second disk.

If you had, you wouldn't have been so careless as to allow Sovak to salvage any of it.

You wanted him to follow us so that he could see for himself that the Uthat wasn't at the cave site.

That was the only way he could be convinced that your quest had been futile.

But how could I have known the Uthat wasn't there?

Because you had already been there once before.

Probably the moment you arrived on the planet.

That's when you found it.

You're a man of many talents, Jean-Luc.

A piece of the future.

A very dangerous piece.

Were you really going to give this to the Daystrom Institute?

Well, maybe not give it.

Five years is a huge investment, Jean-Luc.

I deserve to make a reasonable profit.

Congratulations, Picard.

We knew you would not fail us.

You're not going to just hand it over, are you?

You didn't trust me.

What makes you think you can trust them?

I assume the Vorgons have proof to back up their claim.

Our being here is proof enough.

Wait a second, Vorgons?

The professor's notes said that it was two Vorgons a male and a female, who attempted to steal the Uthat in the first place.

For all we know, it could be them.

You, uh... You're going to have to prove that you are who you say you are.

You yourself said the Uthat belongs to the future.

But not necessarily to you.

You will return what is ours.

No!

Enterprise, Code 14.

Lock onto present coordinates, two-second delay.

Mark!

Are you all right?

Go.

Return to your own time.

There's nothing for you here.

History recorded that you destroyed the Uthat.

You have fulfilled your destiny all too well, Picard.

( buzzing whir )

I don't suppose there are any openings for an archaeologist aboard the Enterprise.

Somehow I doubt you'd find life aboard a starship suitable to your taste.

Probably not.

I could never tolerate all that discipline.

Oh...

So...

What are your plans?

I thought I might explore the ruins on Sarthong V.

Oh! Unbelievable!

You are out of your mind.

The Sarthongians are merciless to trespassers.

Why, Jean-Luc... you really do care about me.

Promise me you will try and stay out of trouble.

I always try.

I wish we had more time together.

Well, perhaps we do.

The Vorgons are time travelers.

Now they know where and when the Uthat can be found they may very well come back and try for it again.

So we may be doing this all over again.

Welcome aboard, Captain.

Status report, Number One.

All went well on Starbase 12.

I think you'll find the ship in splendid condition.

I'll present my compliments to the crew.

Oh, yes, Number One about that Horga'hn you requested.

Yes, sir?

You and I need to have a little chat about that.

Was it a relaxing trip, Captain?

Uh-huh.

I knew he'd have a great time.