Home > Star Trek: The Next Generation

In Theory

Captain's Log, Stardate 44932.3:

The Enterprise is preparing to enter the Mar Oscura,

an unexplored dark matter nebula.

Commander Data is modifying several of our photon torpedoes

for an experiment designed to elicit more information

about this unusual phenomenon.

The initial dispersal pattern should not be more than seven kilometers in diameter.

Jenna?

Oh. Uh, 6.8 kilometers.

That should suffice.

Is there something occupying your thoughts, Jenna?

You seem somewhat subdued today.

I bumped into Jeff again in the turbolift this morning.

He asked me out to dinner.

What was your response?

I told him I'd think about it.

As you requested, I will now remind you of the reasons you decided to end your relationship with Jeff.

I guess I asked for this. Go ahead.

You objected to the fact that he seemed unwilling to set aside sufficient time for you.

You said he was unresponsive, that he never did the little things.

You disliked the sound he made when he ate his soup.

Okay, okay. I remember.

This is the third time I have refreshed your memory.

Do you wish to rescind our agreement?

No. No, it's for my own good.

It's just so easy to forget.

Hand me the sequencer.

Throughout history, many lovers have suffered the same difficulty.

Anne Boleyn was quite distressed that Henry the VIII preferred the company of his huntsmen over that of his wife.

Since when did you develop an interest in romantic historical figures?

Six weeks ago, when you and Jeff dissolved your relationship,

I saw an excellent opportunity to study that aspect of human intimacy.

As your friend, it is my responsibility to be supportive in times of need.

That's, uh... that's very sweet, Data.

Data to Bridge.

We are ready to begin the first illumination test.

Acknowledged.

All science stations stand by.

We're about to light up the nebula. Mr. Worf?

Launch Bay One shows ready, Commander.

Fire torpedo.

Jenna: It's beautiful.

Like watching fireworks when I was a little girl.

Space... the final frontier.

These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise.

Its continuing mission--

to explore strange new worlds,

to seek out new life and new civilizations,

to boldly go where no one has gone before.

( playing Reicha's "Woodwind Quintet in E-flat major" )

That was wonderful. Really?

Really. Wonderful.

Thanks.

Is something wrong?

My tempo was way off.

I felt like I was rushing through the whole piece.

I do not believe that is so.

Your rhythmic control has improved markedly.

I heard no fluctuations during the performance.

Well, maybe, but I ruined the coda.

I got confused with the phrasing again.

I kept breathing at the wrong times.

The contrapuntal nature of the composition is most demanding.

We will give more attention to the rhythmic patterns during our next rehearsal.

However, I am quite certain the audience was oblivious to such nuances.

They seemed to enjoy the performance thoroughly.

Thank you, Data.

You're very generous.

KEIKO: Every night, Miles leaves his socks on the floor.

When we got married,

I made the mistake of picking them up a few times.

Then I realized, if I kept it up,

I'd be doing it for the rest of my life.

So I stopped, figuring he'd get the point and do it himself.

One night goes by... two... a week... ten days.

By now there's a pile of socks half a meter high.

Oh, come on, it wasn't half a meter.

After two weeks, I couldn't stand it anymore.

I bundled them up and put them in the cleaning processor.

And I'm still doing it.

And a very good job she does of it, too.

Keiko, you sound just like Data.

He came over to my quarters the other day to give me a music lesson and he said the funniest thing.

How did you put it?

About the mess?

I believe I observed that you seem to have an aversion to orderliness.

But it was not intended as a humorous remark.

So, before we started, he gallantly offered to help me straighten up.

And a very good job I did of it, too.

Report, Mr. Data.

I have nearly finished compiling readings of our most recent illuminatory burst.

Dark matter density is nearly one order of magnitude higher than in similar nebulae.

Life-forms may have developed in ways never before observed.

Interesting hypothesis.

Are there any M Class planets we can check out? Several, sir.

The nearest is approximately three light-hours from our present position.

It's worth a look.

We'll continue our survey along the way.

Let's increase the flow rate and see if that helps.

( metallic clink )

Sometimes in the summer, we'd go on cookouts-- just my little brother and me and my mother.

She was hopeless without a replicator, we didn't care.

Children often do not develop discerning palettes until well beyond adolescence.

It wasn't that.

It's just that we felt so good being together, you know, as a family.

We didn't have much of that after my father died, so those times were really special.

I wish we were back there now, you and I.

The unidirectional nature of the time continuum makes that an unlikely possibility.

That's what I love about you, Data, you make me laugh.

I don't know why I keep falling for the wrong men.

Why can't I fall for somebody like you?

You're perfect. That is not true.

I have no human feelings.

But you give me so much.

You spend time with me when I'm lonely.

You encourage me when I'm down.

No man has ever been kinder to me.

Those are the things that matter.

I better be going.

With your permission, Commander.

Permission granted.

I don't know if you're aware of this, but you're very handsome.

I'll see you tomorrow.

Hello, Data.

Would you like to try something new?

It's a concoction I heard about on Prakal II.

I think it's wonderful, but I need a second opinion.

87% Saurian brandy.

Targ milk and Denevian mead comprise the rest.

There is an unusually high concentration of fructose compound and monosaccharides.

Too sweet?

Data, if I didn't know you better,

I would say you were a little... preoccupied.

Lieutenant D'Sora just gave me what could be considered a very passionate kiss in the Torpedo Bay.

Really?

And...

I was intrigued.

Jenna seemed to be displaying genuine affection for me.

Well... what do you think of her, Data?

I find her to be a competent officer, highly motivated, though, somewhat lacking in her understanding of the theory underlying the dilithium matrix application.

I meant personally.

I look forward to the time we spend together.

Well, then it seems the next move is yours.

What are you going to do?

I do not know.

I have no experience in such matters.

I require advice.

Don't look at me.

No, no, Data.

I simply mean that I can't give you any advice here.

It's not good to advise people about their first love affairs.

That's kind of something people have to figure out for themselves.

But I am not capable of love.

Then it's going to be a very unique experience.

Data?

Missing someone?

I found Spot wandering through the corridor two sections away.

Thank you.

Forget to secure the door when you left?

The door sensor is programmed to recognize only humanoid forms per entrance and egress.

Spot could not have triggered the mechanism.

Maybe somebody came in while you were away.

Let him out by accident.

Has anything been disturbed?

It does not appear so.

Computer, has anyone been in my quarters in the last 12 hours other than Commander La Forge or myself?

COMPUTER: Negative.

That's pretty strange.

You know, to be on the safe side, maybe I should report a possible unauthorized entry to Security.

Geordi, may I ask your advice... in a personal matter?

Sure, Data.

Should I pursue a relationship with Lieutenant D'Sora?

I thought she and Jeff Arton...

They have discontinued their association.

She has made the first move in initiating a relationship with me.

What should I do?

( sighs )

Boy.

If she's just coming out of a bad situation... you know, sometimes it takes people a while, Data.

But then, if they jump right into another relationship... you see that can be trouble.

Unless, of course, she's really ready and then... well, I guess it depends on whether or not you're really serious.

This can be a little complicated.

Listen, my advice is... ask somebody else for advice.

At least someone who's got more experience at giving advice.

I think you should be careful.

This isn't just some experiment you're running, Data.

Jenna is a living, breathing person with needs and feelings that have to be considered.

Then you do not believe I should pursue this any further.

I didn't say that.

I just want you to be aware that this is unlike any other more casual relationship that you've attempted.

I have studied much human literature on the subject of love and romantic liaisons.

There are many role models for me to emulate.

Ultimately, Jenna will care for you for who you are, not what you imitate out of a book.

My programming may be inadequate to the task.

We're all more than the sum of our parts, Data.

You'll have to be more than the sum of your programming.

Klingons do not pursue relationships.

They conquer that which they desire.

However...

Lieutenant D'Sora serves under my command.

If she were mistreated,

I would be very displeased... sir.

I understand.

I think you should pursue it.

First of all, she's a beautiful woman.

She seems to be crazy about you.

Jenna has clearly demonstrated how she feels about me, but I am not capable of returning those feelings.

Data... when you get involved with another person, there are always risks-- of disappointment, of getting hurt.

I cannot be hurt, but she can.

Jenna knows that and she has obviously decided to take the chance.

Data, when it really works between two people, it's not like anything you've ever experienced.

The rewards are far greater than simple friendship.

How far, sir?

That's what I'm hoping you're going to find out.

Captain?

I am seeking advice in how to...

Yes, I've heard, Data.

And I will be delighted to offer any advice I can on understanding women.

When I have some, I'll let you know.

Second Officer's Personal Log,

Stardate 44935.6:

After conferring with my colleagues

regarding the nature of romantic love in general,

and my own situation in particular,

I have reached a decision.

Oh, they're lovely.

Come in.

What are they? A variety of crystilia.

Their fragrance is an evolutionary response to the acrid nature of the atmosphere on Telemarius IV.

You silver-tongued devil.

Um, why don't I find a place to put these... which won't be that easy.

Ah.

It seems your quarters have reverted to their earlier state of disorder.

I know. I'm hopeless.

There.

They're beautiful, Data.

It's really sweet of you.

Commander Riker suggested this particular flower.

He said it had worked for him in the past.

You didn't talk to the entire ship about us?

No. In actuality, less than one percent of the Enterprise crew was involved.

Huh.

It was necessary to balance theory with experiential referents.

Both are required for a program of this nature.

Computer, decrease illumination level by one-third standard lux.

Uh, this is all part of a program?

Yes, one which I just created for romantic relationships.

So I'm, uh, I'm just a small variable in one of your new computational environments?

You are much more than that, Jenna.

I have written a subroutine specifically for you-- a program within the program.

I have devoted a considerable share of my internal resources to its development.

Data... that's the nicest thing anybody's ever said to me.

Estimated time of arrival, Mr. Data.

We will reach the Class M planet in approximately 11 hours, sir.

You have the Bridge, Number One.

Picard to Lieutenant Worf.

Yes, Captain.

PICARD: Would you step into my ready room, please?

And bring a tricorder with you.

Aye, Captain.

Captain?

What do you make of this?

I am puzzled, sir. So am I, Mr. Worf.

The only detectable bioelectric residuals are your own.

You did not... No, I did not.

Well, perhaps we have a poltergeist.

Sir?

A mischievous spirit.

Sir.

Perhaps not.

I cannot explain how an intruder entered this room.

But I recommend we go to red alert. Not yet.

Then I will order one of my officers to stand watch.

Worf to Ensign-- That's all right, Mr. Worf.

I think, for now, circumstances warrant caution, nothing more.

As you wish, Captain.

( door chimes )

Enter.

I know it's a little unexpected.

You are correct.

I did not anticipate your arrival until 1900 hours.

Well, I couldn't wait.

Um, I wanted you to have this.

You have often expressed dissatisfaction with the spartan nature of my quarters.

Is this an attempt at embellishment?

The cat's out of the bag.

Spot?

No, I mean you've caught me in the act.

I'm just trying to brighten things up around here.

It's Tyrinean.

What do you think?

Its line is both fluid and formal, yet retains an unpremeditated quality.

The tactility of its surface embellishment is evocative of the neo-primitive period in Tyrinean blade carving.

Um, I hadn't thought of it in that way.

I'm sorry. Don't let me interrupt.

As you wish.

Uh, Data? Yes?

The book of love, chapter four, paragraph 17-- when your girlfriend arrives with a gift, stop whatever it is you're doing and give her your undivided attention.

I should not have resumed my painting.

No.

Despite your suggestion that I continue.

Exactly.

I have much to learn.

Um, why don't we start with this?

A critical analysis isn't necessarily the best response to a gift.

Perhaps if I looked for a suitable place to display it.

Much better.

The ambient light in this location accentuates its contours.

However... a gift should not necessarily be placed according to aesthetic criteria.

A more central location would give added meaning.

Data, what's important is that you're trying.

You don't know how much that means to me.

Why don't you go back to your painting?

Oh, I really mean it this time.

I'll see you tonight.

RIKER: Riker to Captain Picard.

I think you'd better come out here, sir.

Acknowledged.

We've reached the designated coordinates, but the M Class planet... it's gone.

Are you sure there was no malfunction in the sensors?

The lateral E-M scanners register radiation levels indicative of a Class M planet.

Sir...

Mr. Data, run a full systems diagnostic.

COMPUTER: Warning-- atmospheric decompression in Bridge observation lounge.

Environmental compensation sequence has been initiated.

I am not registering a hull breach.

Scan for life-forms. None, sir.

Captain, standard air pressure has been reestablished in the observation lounge.

Let's have a look. Mr. Data?

Captain.

WORF: I do not understand.

Are you picking anything up, Data?

I detect no unusual readings along standard parameters.

Curious.

The transparent aluminum alloy of this window is exhibiting a pattern of transient electrical currents.

Explanation. I have none.

The rate is characteristic of a subspace distortion, but I am picking up no evidence of a subspace field.

We'll hold position while we seek an explanation of these anomalies.

Let's divert all our resources to that end.

Honey, I'm home.

Hi. Hi.

Any luck with your diagnostic?

Negative. We found no malfunctions.

We did a full security sweep.

Nothing.

May I... get you a drink, dear?

Well, yes.

I'll... I'll have a Calaman sherry.

Excellent choice.

I'll join you.

Computer, two...

Calaman sherries.

Would you care for some dinner as well?

Oh, I'm too tired to think about what I want.

Maybe later.

Whatever you wish, dear.

There we are.

Uh-uh...

Darling, you remain as aesthetically pleasing as the first day we met.

I believe I am the most fortunate sentient in this sector of the galaxy.

You... relax... put your feet up... and I will take care of everything.

( singing aria from La Boheme )

I could organize your closets for you.

I have found that by grouping apparel, first by function, then by color, from light to dark, one can more easily find one's desired choice.

Uh, Data... that's all right.

You don't have to do that.

But I am happy to do it.

Please, just put them down.

( shoes dropping )

What do you wish me to do, dear?

Am I not paying enough attention to you?

Oh, no, that's not it, um...

Perhaps I am not giving you enough compliments.

Your hair... is looking particularly silky tonight.

Data, there's just something strange about the way you're acting.

Am I not behaving as a solicitous mate?

Well, yes, but...

Tending to your every need?

What's wrong with you tonight?

My most recent self-diagnostic revealed no malfunctions.

Perhaps there is something wrong with you!

I've never seen you behave so foolishly.

Why are you doing this?

You don't tell me how to behave. You're not my mother!

What?

You are not my mother.

That is the appropriate response for your statement that I am behaving foolishly.

Data, I think you should just leave.

You do not wish to continue our lovers' quarrel?

Is that what this is?

In my study of interpersonal dynamics,

I have found that conflict, followed by emotional release often strengthens the connection between two people.

But there's something so forced and artificial about the way you're doing it, Data.

It's just not the real you.

With regard to romantic relationships, there is no real me.

I am drawing upon various cultural and literary sources to help define my role.

Kiss me.

What were you just thinking?

In that particular moment,

I was reconfiguring the warp field parameters, analyzing the collective works of Charles Dickens, calculating the maximum pressure

I could safely apply to your lips, considering a food supplement for Spot...

I'm glad I was in there somewhere.

A complete sensor scan of the planet and three survey probes came up with no surprises.

No signs of life. Nothing out of the ordinary.

Seven more unusual incidents have been reported.

No casualties or damage.

We can only state that a subspace effect seems to exist within this nebula.

After I have made further analysis,

I may be able to adjust the ship's sensors to locate and identify the anomaly.

RIKER: The ship's at risk as long as we're sitting here.

We could continue the investigation outside the nebula.

Agreed.

Ensign McKnight, plot the most direct course ahead warp one.

Aye, sir. Engage.

DATA: Captain...

Captain, explosive decompression on Deck 37.

Bridge to La Forge. Damage report.

We're showing damage between decks.

We haven't localized it yet.

( moaning )

Thorne, are you all right? Yes, sir.

La Forge to Bridge.

A cryogenic control conduit just blew out on us.

I almost lost a man.

Ensign, full stop.

Aye, sir.

LA FORGE: La Forge to Bridge. Go ahead, Commander.

LA FORGE: I think we have some structural damage between Decks 36 and 37.

I'd better go check it out.

Van Mayter, you take access tube 23 M and look at those Bridge connectors.

Thorne, I'll cover the aft section.

You go down...

( woman screams )

Captain's Log, supplemental:

This series of unexplained events

has now resulted in the death of a crewman.

But it appears Mr. Data may have an explanation.

DATA: During the last occurrence,

I was able to confirm one of my hypotheses.

The unusual preponderance of dark matter in this nebula is causing small gaps in the fabric of normal space.

As the Enterprise moves through this nebula, it is colliding with these deformations.

So every time we hit one, part of the ship momentarily phases out of normal space.

Or when one of them hits us.

My readings suggest that the deformations are in motion.

It's a good thing one of those pockets didn't pass through the photon torpedo casings.

Or one of the matter/anti-matter containment pods.

The question is how do we get out?

Mr. Data, could you reconfigure the sensors so as to detect these anomalies?

Yes, sir, but only at extremely close range.

Even at minimal speed, it would be impossible to maneuver the Enterprise quickly enough to avoid them.

A shuttlecraft is more maneuverable.

He's right.

If we could position the shuttlecraft far enough in front of the Enterprise, it could detect the pockets and allow us enough time to maneuver out of the way.

We could give the shuttle control of our navigational systems.

That way the corresponding maneuvers would be virtually instantaneous.

Make it so.

RIKER: I'll do my pre-flight once I'm on board.

Not this time, Will. I want you on the Bridge.

Sir?

I'm going to pilot the shuttle.

Captain, it is my duty as First Officer to safeguard the lives on this ship, including yours.

The Enterprise can't afford to lose you, certainly not in this situation.

I believe our best chance of escaping this situation is for me to pilot the shuttle.

It's my ship, Will.

I've got to do this.

Sir.

Shuttle three to Enterprise.

Telemetry link enabled.

DATA: Ship's computer is accepting navigational inputs from the shuttle.

Forward sensors are online.

Ensign McKnight, plot a course for the shortest distance out of the nebula.

McKNIGHT: Plot laid in, sir.

Outer perimeter at 32 million kilometers.

PICARD: Point one impulse, Number One.

Acknowledged, Captain, We're right behind you.

Riker to O'Brien, lock on to the Captain's communicator.

I want to be able to pull him out of there in case we have to.

Aye, sir.

Changing course.

New heading, 299.029.

Main coupling is matching navigational inputs, Captain.

New heading confirmed.

I missed it by less than 1,000 meters, Enterprise.

Advise your status.

Sensors indicate deformation passing 500 meters off the starboard bow.

One down, Captain.

Resuming previous course.

McKNIGHT: Confirmed.

Outer perimeter now at 30.1 million kilometers.

Changing course. Heading 073.288.

New heading, 284.01--

Enterprise, I'm losing maneuverability.

Sensors indicate damage to the shuttle's starboard impulse nacelle.

I'm re-routing the secondary deuterium supply.

Switching to manual control.

Transceiver signal is down 42%.

Navigational inputs are not registering.

We've lost our link, Captain.

You'll have to make course changes manually until we reestablish the connection.

Understood. Mr. Data, get us back online.

Geordi, boosting the power to the L-U bands.

McKnight, increase the distance between the Enterprise and the shuttle.

We're going to need some more room to make manual adjustments.

New heading, 299.18.

McKNIGHT: Yes, sir, I've got it. Course corrected.

Enterprise, hard starboard!

McKNIGHT: Aye, sir.

Deformation impact on Deck 15,

Science section.

Damage?

WORF: Reports coming in. Minimal damage.

Mr. La Forge,

I'm still having difficulty controlling the shuttlecraft.

LA FORGE: Aye, sir. Your krellide storage cells are losing their charge.

Maintaining manual control is going to become increasingly difficult.

Estimated distance to the nebula's perimeter?

DATA: 4.7 million kilometers, sir.

Is there a way to transfer the microfusion thrusters so I can get a power boost?

DATA: Possibly.

If you augment the thruster sequencing so that the inertial dampening fields...

Relative bearing 27... make that 285.255.

Commander, the shuttle is out of control.

Mr. O'Brien, do you have the Captain's signal?

O'Brien: I'm having trouble locking on, sir.

Sir, the shuttle's inertial dampeners have failed.

It is breaking up.

Let's get him out of there.

Now would be a good time, Mr. O'Brien.

Did we get him back?

O'BRIEN: Aye, sir, we got him.

PICARD: I'm a little dizzy, Number One, but none the worse.

I'm on my way.

Acknowledged, sir.

Commander, we are nearing the perimeter.

One million kilometers away.

All right, let's make a run for it.

McKNIGHT: Aye, sir.

We're clear of the nebula, sir.

Ensign, plot a course for Starbase 260. Warp two.

Aye, sir.

Engage.

( door chimes )

Enter.

Hi.

Hi.

The place looks great.

Thank you.

It is much less spartan, is it not?

Much less.

It looks great.

It really does.

It looks... great.

Jenna, you are repeating yourself.

I have often found this to be indicative of a mental distraction.

Is that a correct assumption in this instance?

Um, I'm afraid it is.

Then perhaps we should begin our meal.

Among humans, a low serum glucose level is...

Data, I think we should talk.

Could you sit down?

Um...

I'm not sure how to begin.

What is the subject?

You and I.

Our relationship. Yes?

Data, sometimes people blindly make the same mistake again and again.

Are you currently experiencing this phenomenon?

I didn't see it until today.

I got out of a relationship with an unemotional man and I got right back into another one... with... with a man who's absolutely incapable of emotion.

Hmm... there does appear to be a recurring motif.

You were so kind and attentive.

I thought that would be enough.

Is it not?

No, it's not.

Because as close as we are, I...

I don't really matter to you.

Not really.

Nothing I can say or do will ever make you happy or sad... or touch you in any way.

That is a valid projection.

It is apparent that my reach has exceeded my grasp in this particular area.

I am, perhaps, not nearly so human as I aspire to become.

If you are ready to eat, I will bring our meal.

Uh... no.

That's all right, Data.

I'm going to go now.

As you wish.

Jenna... are we no longer... a couple?

No, we're not.

Then I will delete the appropriate program.

I'll see you later.

Hello, Spot.