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00:00:07

DOCTOR: Turn 90 degrees to the left please.

00:00:10

Turn 90 degrees to the left please.

00:00:13

Turn 90 degrees to the right please.

00:00:17

About face.

00:00:24

Try to hold still, please.

00:00:25

Is it going to hurt?

00:00:27

Of course not.

00:00:29

A few photons never hurt anybody.

00:00:33

We didn't do this last year.

00:00:37

That's because last year, I didn't realize what an exciting tool my holo-imager could be in the pursuit of medical knowledge.

00:00:45

Is something wrong with me?

00:00:47

Your health is excellent.

00:00:49

This is just another way to make sure that it stays excellent.

00:00:52

Does my mother have to do this?

00:00:54

Your mother and everybody else on board.

00:00:56

I've made it part of the annual checkup.

00:00:58

It's quite handy really.

00:01:00

By attuning the resonance spectrum along a subspace band,

00:01:03

I can take an image of my patients all the way down to the subatomic level.

00:01:07

Subatomic level?

00:01:08

I thought you said this wasn't going to hurt.

00:01:10

I did...and it won't.

00:01:16

There...see?

00:01:18

Nothing to it.

00:01:19

Try to hold still please.

00:01:23

Are you making fun of me?

00:01:25

No.

00:01:28

It'll only take a second to download your images into the medical database, if you'd like to stay for a moment, and see what you look like from the inside out.

00:01:36

Why not?

00:01:39

Here we go.

00:01:54

Handsome fellow.

00:01:58

Hmm.

00:02:05

There's some scar tissue along the base of your lower skull.

00:02:09

Computer, isolate the occipital plexus, magnification 500.

00:02:14

There.

00:02:16

Scarring along the dura mater.

00:02:18

From what?

00:02:19

An operation.

00:02:21

Computer, isolate the cranial meninges, magnification 100.

00:02:28

More scarring.

00:02:30

No doubt about it, somebody performed neurosurgery.

00:02:36

And that somebody... was me.

00:02:40

These microlinear incisions are a dead giveaway.

00:02:43

I developed that procedure myself.

00:02:45

I don't understand.

00:02:47

I don't remember having an operation.

00:02:49

I'm a little confused as well... because I don't remember performing it.

00:04:50

( door chimes )

00:04:51

Who is it?

00:04:52

DOCTOR: The Doctor.

00:04:54

Come in.

00:04:56

I've finished giving the crew their annual physicals.

00:04:58

But as usual, the Captain was a no-show.

00:05:01

Let's get it over with.

00:05:03

Specific complaints?

00:05:04

None. How's the crew?

00:05:06

In good health, for the most part.

00:05:08

I found a nascent alien retrovirus bouncing between personnel on Decks ten and 11, but managed to nip it in the bud.

00:05:15

And there's been a little more wear and tear on Seven of Nine's cranial infrastructure.

00:05:19

I'm going to double her maintenance routine.

00:05:21

Cyto-metabolism is normal.

00:05:23

Endocrine functions functioning.

00:05:25

That's a relief.

00:05:29

I'd like you to drop by Sick Bay at your earliest convenience.

00:05:32

I've adjusted my holo-imager for deep body scans.

00:05:34

You're the only member of the crew who hasn't posed for me yet.

00:05:37

Maybe next week.

00:05:39

It's a fine instrument, really.

00:05:41

I've already discovered something of a mystery with it.

00:05:44

Apparently, I performed a complex neurosurgery on Harry Kim.

00:05:48

According to the isotope decay, around the scars, it was 18 months ago.

00:05:53

I don't remember that.

00:05:54

Neither do I and... neither does the patient.

00:05:57

I checked my medical entries for that period.

00:05:59

There's no mention of surgery.

00:06:01

Could your holo-imager have misinterpreted the scans?

00:06:03

Possibly.

00:06:05

The computer is double-checking the data now.

00:06:08

I'd also like to run a complete diagnostic on my own program, and have a look at my memory files.

00:06:13

B'Elanna and Harry are both busy with the plasma relay repairs.

00:06:16

Let's make sure you're next up on the list.

00:06:18

Thank you, Doctor.

00:06:29

Hello, Seven.

00:06:30

Doctor.

00:06:31

I'm here to ask you a favor.

00:06:33

Another time.

00:06:34

I beg your pardon?

00:06:35

I am recalibrating the deflector dish.

00:06:37

Come back tomorrow.

00:06:38

I should be finished by then.

00:06:40

( sighs )

00:06:41

Looks like I'm two for two.

00:06:43

Oh, the Captain's acting like she's allergic to me, and now my prized pupil won't even give me the time of day.

00:06:53

State your request.

00:06:55

A little mystery has cropped up, evidence that I performed surgery on Ensign Kim a year and a half ago, before you came aboard.

00:07:03

The trouble is...

00:07:06

I don't remember it.

00:07:09

I wanted you to help me run a self-diagnostic.

00:07:12

I will assist you... in one hour.

00:07:15

Fair enough.

00:07:29

Computer, locate the Emergency Medical Hologram.

00:07:32

COMPUTER: The EMH is inactive.

00:07:34

Activate him.

00:07:35

Please state the nature of the medical emergency.

00:07:38

I'm here to assist you, as I agreed.

00:07:40

I've run a preliminary diagnostic of your program.

00:07:43

Your suspicions were correct.

00:07:45

I never asked you to run a diagnostic.

00:07:47

Suspicions? What are you talking about?

00:07:49

You don't recall speaking to me in the Astrometrics Lab one hour ago.

00:07:52

No.

00:07:54

The last I remember,

00:07:56

I was completing the yearly physicals.

00:07:57

You mentioned a neurosurgery you performed on Ensign Kim 18 months ago.

00:08:01

Computer, locate the holo-scans

00:08:04

I took of Ensign Kim this morning.

00:08:07

Any operation would show up on--

00:08:09

COMPUTER: Unavailable. That file has been deleted.

00:08:13

Let's have a look at my program.

00:08:18

A deletion in your short-term memory buffer.

00:08:21

Our chat in Astrometrics never got filed.

00:08:24

That's why I can't remember it.

00:08:26

Hmm...

00:08:27

If I were given to paranoia,

00:08:29

I'd say someone is trying to keep me from finding out what happened 18 months ago.

00:08:34

Hmm...

00:08:37

My photo album.

00:08:38

Doctor...

00:08:40

I was quite a shutterbug back then.

00:08:41

Not a day went by when I didn't record an image for posterity.

00:08:45

Let's have a walk down memory lane.

00:08:47

Meet me on Holodeck 2.

00:08:57

Computer, display all holo-images taken on Stardate 50979.

00:09:01

COMPUTER: Those holo-images have been deleted.

00:09:03

Deleted? By whom?

00:09:06

COMPUTER: Unknown.

00:09:10

I'm detecting residual photons in the holo-buffer.

00:09:15

It may be possible to partially reconstruct the images.

00:09:18

Try.

00:09:22

I've restored five images.

00:09:23

They are degraded but intact.

00:09:25

Let's see them.

00:09:29

The Mess Hall.

00:09:30

Do you remember this? No.

00:09:33

Who is that? The Ensign.

00:09:37

It seems to be her birthday.

00:09:40

I've never seen her before.

00:09:44

The Ensign again.

00:09:46

I never went on a shuttle mission with Harry Kim, and certainly not with her.

00:09:53

And again.

00:10:15

I've isolated your memory files from Stardate 50979.

00:10:18

They weren't deleted?

00:10:19

No.

00:10:20

Then why can't I remember them?

00:10:22

The program was rewritten to deny you access to those memories.

00:10:26

I'm trying to restore them.

00:10:30

Here, here.

00:10:31

ALL: Here, here.

00:10:33

DOCTOR: Say cheese.

00:10:34

ALL: Cheese. Cheese.

00:10:37

What happened?

00:10:39

I was in the Mess Hall.

00:10:40

The files are difficult to localize.

00:10:42

The memories will be out of sequence.

00:10:49

What was that?

00:10:50

Our sensors are dead.

00:10:51

PARIS: Make a wish.

00:10:55

They've stopped.

00:10:56

One moment.

00:11:03

Make a wish.

00:11:13

I'm gonna kill you.

00:11:20

Ensign, I haven't seen you in months.

00:11:22

The price I pay for staying in good health, I guess.

00:11:25

Acetylcholine, 25 microliters.

00:11:29

( alarm bleeping )

00:11:31

It's not helping.

00:11:32

I'm reading massive synaptic failure.

00:11:34

That doesn't make any sense.

00:11:43

This is the last one.

00:11:44

Say cheese.

00:11:45

Cheese. Cheese.

00:11:56

Call the Captain.

00:12:05

I don't recognize this species. Seven?

00:12:08

They are unknown to the Borg.

00:12:10

Perhaps these images have been manipulated.

00:12:12

No. They're real.

00:12:13

The image buffer would've shown signs of tampering.

00:12:16

I have a different theory.

00:12:18

I believe there was an attack on Voyager by this species, and all our memories of the event were erased.

00:12:26

This is the unknown crewman I told you about,

00:12:29

Ensign Jetal.

00:12:30

The question is, who was she?

00:12:34

An alien intruder posing as a Starfleet Ensign?

00:12:37

Of course, it's impossible to tell from a photograph, but one thing is certain, we are in immediate danger.

00:12:43

How so?

00:12:46

Only a few hours ago, as I was beginning this investigation, someone shut down my program, and eliminated all my memories of the last 24 hours.

00:12:55

An intruder may be on board.

00:12:59

Run a deck-by-deck security sweep.

00:13:01

Understood.

00:13:03

Report to the Astrometrics Lab and recalibrate the sensors.

00:13:05

See if you can detect any cloaked vessels nearby.

00:13:08

I'll review the medical records of the rest of the crew.

00:13:11

Ensign Kim may not have been the only one who was injured during the attack.

00:13:14

No. I want you to deactivate yourself for now.

00:13:16

We'll erect a security field around the main computer, and encrypt all pathways leading to your program.

00:13:21

If someone does try to tamper with you again,

00:13:23

I want to be ready.

00:13:24

Captain--

00:13:26

It's for your own safety, Doctor.

00:13:27

Thank you for bringing this to my attention.

00:13:29

You will keep me informed?

00:13:30

Absolutely.

00:13:32

Dismissed.

00:13:51

Computer...transfer my program from the mobile emitter to the Sick Bay systems.

00:13:56

COMPUTER: Transfer complete.

00:14:01

Computer...

00:14:06

Duplicate all of my memory files recorded within the last 48 hours.

00:14:11

COMPUTER: Duplication complete.

00:14:13

Now...I'm going offline.

00:14:18

If my program is altered without my authorization, reactivate me and restore the duplicate memory files.

00:14:25

Interface with the holo-imaging device.

00:14:27

If anybody enters this room, commence imaging in five second intervals.

00:14:32

COMPUTER: Acknowledged.

00:14:38

Computer, deactivate EMH.

00:14:41

( computer beeps )

00:14:55

( door opens, closes )

00:15:17

( footsteps approaching )

00:15:18

( door opens, closes )

00:15:25

Please state the nature of the medical emergency.

00:15:31

Hello?

00:15:33

COMPUTER: Restoring memory files.

00:15:38

Restoration complete.

00:16:14

Believe me, I was there.

00:16:15

So was I.

00:16:17

TUVOK: Commander Chakotay is correct.

00:16:19

Oh? And how would you know?

00:16:20

In my youth, I studied many forms of martial art, including the sumo of Earth.

00:16:25

I've followed the sport ever since.

00:16:27

It was the 77th Emperor's Cup.

00:16:29

Takashi forced Kar-pek out of the circle in less than three seconds.

00:16:33

I had a fifth row seat.

00:16:35

CHAKOTAY: Then you must have been ordering sake, because Takashi's knee broke the sand, and the referee gave the match to Kar-pek.

00:16:41

TUVOK: Exactly.

00:16:43

If this is another house call, it'll have to wait.

00:16:45

As you can see, I've got a mutiny on my hands.

00:16:48

A mutiny? I suppose that's better than a conspiracy.

00:16:54

Doctor.

00:16:56

Tell her, Captain.

00:16:57

Describe how you tampered with my program, how it was you all along.

00:17:03

Perhaps you should accompany me to Sick Bay, Doctor.

00:17:07

Et tu, Tuvok?

00:17:10

You're conspiring against me, all of you.

00:17:12

Why?

00:17:16

In my ready room.

00:17:25

You've been manipulating my program.

00:17:27

Don't deny it.

00:17:28

I don't intend to.

00:17:30

But...the alien ship, the intruder, did that attack actually happen?

00:17:34

Yes. You were damaged during the incident.

00:17:37

"Damaged"?

00:17:39

It caused a conflict in your programming that couldn't be resolved.

00:17:42

What kind of conflict?

00:17:43

I had no choice but to deny you access to your memories of those events.

00:17:47

What kind of conflict?

00:17:49

If I told you that, I might set the whole thing in motion again.

00:17:52

This "conflict" in my programming...

00:17:54

Yes? that's not good enough.

00:17:55

It'll have to be. Captain!

00:17:57

I've made a command decision for your own benefit, and the welfare of this entire crew.

00:18:01

I'm not willing to debate it.

00:18:02

How would you like it if I operated on you without your consent or without your knowledge?

00:18:06

If the operation saved my life? I could live with it.

00:18:09

I don't believe you.

00:18:10

You'd feel as violated as I do right now.

00:18:12

Whether you believe me or not is beside the point.

00:18:14

A year and a half ago, the only solution was to rewrite your program.

00:18:18

I have to perform that same procedure now.

00:18:21

That isn't fair.

00:18:23

You're malfunctioning, and you need to be repaired.

00:18:27

Return to Sick Bay and wait for my orders.

00:18:39

( sighs )

00:18:53

( door opens )

00:18:55

Doctor.

00:18:56

What's happening?

00:18:58

What are you doing?

00:19:00

Lieutenant Torres requires a copy of your most recent memory files, including the backups.

00:19:05

You're going to rewrite my program.

00:19:06

The Captain thinks it's for the best.

00:19:08

I'm sorry.

00:19:10

B'Elanna and Seven are setting up the procedure right now.

00:19:12

In the meantime, you're to brief

00:19:14

Mr. Paris about any experiments you're performing, any tests.

00:19:18

I'll be filling in while your program's offline.

00:19:25

Okay. So you're running some kind of cell analysis?

00:19:29

Yes. Well, let's take a look.

00:19:32

What happened 18 months ago?

00:19:34

Doc... Why won't the Captain tell me?

00:19:38

She has her reasons. And you agree with her?

00:19:43

I was there...and yes, I agree with her.

00:19:58

( classical theme playing )

00:20:19

( door chimes )

00:20:22

Come in.

00:20:27

Are you having a little trouble regenerating?

00:20:30

My alcove is functioning properly.

00:20:34

I am having trouble with the nature of individuality.

00:20:37

( chuckles )

00:20:39

There's a time and a place for philosophical discussion.

00:20:43

Two in the morning in my quarters isn't one of them, but I'll tell you what.

00:20:46

Meet me in the Mess Hall tomorrow--

00:20:48

Tomorrow will be too late.

00:20:50

We'll have already rewritten the Doctor's program by then.

00:20:56

And violated his rights as an individual.

00:20:59

Precisely.

00:21:01

If you've come to act as my conscience, you're a little late.

00:21:05

I considered these issues 18 months ago, as I did again this morning.

00:21:10

I came to the same conclusion.

00:21:12

Your conclusion is wrong.

00:21:19

Coffee, black.

00:21:30

Lukewarm.

00:21:31

Now I've told that replicator a dozen times about the temperature of my coffee.

00:21:36

It just doesn't seem to want to listen... almost as if it's got a mind of its own, but it doesn't.

00:21:44

A replicator operates through a series of electronic pathways that allow it to receive instructions and take appropriate action, and there you go, a cup of coffee, a bowl of soup, a plasma conduit, whatever we tell it to do.

00:22:00

As difficult as it is to accept... the Doctor is more like that replicator than he is like us.

00:22:08

He would disagree.

00:22:09

I'm sure he would, but I can't let that change my decision.

00:22:13

I learned that the hard way, when his program almost self-destructed.

00:22:18

I won't take that risk again.

00:22:20

The risk isn't yours to take.

00:22:22

If one of my crew chose to put a phaser to his own head, should I let him?

00:22:27

It would depend on the situation.

00:22:30

It always depends on the situation, Seven, but we can debate philosophy another time.

00:22:39

When you separated me from the collective,

00:22:41

I was an unknown risk to your crew, yet you kept me on board, you allowed me to evolve into an individual.

00:22:49

You're a human being.

00:22:51

He's a hologram.

00:22:53

And you allowed that hologram to evolve as well, to exceed his original programming, and yet, now you choose to abandon him.

00:23:00

Objection noted.

00:23:03

Good night.

00:23:10

It is unsettling.

00:23:13

You say that I am a human being and yet, I am also Borg... part of me not unlike your replicator... not unlike the Doctor.

00:23:25

Will you one day choose to abandon me as well?

00:23:29

I have always looked to you as my example, my guide to humanity.

00:23:37

Perhaps I've been mistaken.

00:23:40

Good night.

00:23:51

( door opens )

00:24:09

I'd like to think I made my decision 18 months ago for all the right reasons.

00:24:14

The truth is, my own biases about what you are had just as much to do with it.

00:24:22

At the very least, you deserve to know exactly what happened... if you're willing.

00:24:41

I'm ready.

00:24:55

( console beeping )

00:25:00

PARIS: You're standing on my foot.

00:25:02

DOCTOR: I am not.

00:25:03

Shh...

00:25:04

( giggling )

00:25:06

If you ask me, they should have just locked the turbolift...

00:25:09

Neelix... the power's down.

00:25:10

Jetal to Torres.

00:25:13

TORRES: Uh, go ahead, Ensign.

00:25:14

Or should I say...

00:25:17

ALL: Surprise!

00:25:19

( all clapping )

00:25:23

( jovial theme plays )

00:25:30

I'm gonna kill you.

00:25:34

I want you to go along on a few of the shuttle surveys... if I can talk you into it. Another away mission?

00:25:39

Certainly. I'm flattered.

00:25:40

I guess the birthday girl and I get the pleasure of your company, Doc.

00:25:44

You launch at 1900 hours, Shuttle Bay 1.

00:25:48

Hello, Doctor.

00:25:50

Ensign Jetal.

00:25:51

I haven't seen you in months.

00:25:53

The price I pay for staying in good health.

00:25:56

So, keeping busy down on Deck 11?

00:25:59

Too busy.

00:26:00

We're modifying one of the shuttles, making it more maneuverable and more...cool.

00:26:05

Hmm...I see you've been working with Mr. Paris.

00:26:08

My condolences.

00:26:10

I thought I picked up a slight distortion in subspace, but it's not there anymore.

00:26:16

Nothing on our long-range sensors, but a few hydrogen atoms.

00:26:21

Candid shot?

00:26:23

DOCTOR: Try to look natural.

00:26:25

At least it's my good side.

00:26:30

Let's get one of the group.

00:26:37

( timer beeping )

00:26:40

This is the last one.

00:26:42

Say cheese.

00:26:43

ALL: Cheese.

00:26:45

Doctor, I have a shuttle to fly.

00:26:47

Ah, yes.

00:26:51

What was that?

00:26:53

Our sensors are dead.

00:26:54

Power's being drained.

00:26:55

Shields and weapons are offline.

00:26:57

How?

00:26:58

( alarm beeping )

00:27:04

( transporter whoosh )

00:27:14

( groans )

00:27:31

Doctor to Voyager. Mayday.

00:27:33

We're under attack!

00:27:34

I've got wounded. Mayday!

00:27:35

CHAKOTAY: Acknowledged, Doctor.

00:27:38

Set navigational controls to return to Voyager.

00:27:40

Commander, can you hear me?

00:27:41

CHAKOTAY: Please respond. Hello?

00:27:43

Computer, engage auto navigation.

00:27:45

Lay in a course for Voyager, full impulse.

00:27:47

Doctor...

00:27:48

Stay calm.

00:27:49

That weapon carried quite a punch.

00:27:52

Is she okay?

00:27:53

She's unconscious.

00:27:55

Voyager...

00:27:57

We've lost contact.

00:28:00

I sent that alien back to his ship.

00:28:02

You think they'd be grateful.

00:28:03

You should have beamed... him...into space.

00:28:07

I'm not in the business of killing people, Ensign.

00:28:10

( tricorder beeping )

00:28:11

Synaptic shock...?

00:28:13

But there was no neural damage.

00:28:16

Mr. Kim!

00:28:18

I don't understand!

00:28:23

Oh, no!

00:28:30

CHAKOTAY: Doctor, stand by for transport.

00:28:33

Beam us directly to Sick Bay.

00:28:41

Prepare these people for surgery.

00:28:48

PARIS: Here, what happened?

00:28:49

DOCTOR: We were fired on.

00:28:51

There's something wrong with their nervous systems.

00:28:53

We've got to stabilize their synapses.

00:28:55

Get me a choline compound.

00:28:56

Which choline compound?

00:28:57

It doesn't matter.

00:28:58

Just make sure it's a pure base.

00:29:05

Her spinal cord's deteriorating.

00:29:10

Same rate of collapse.

00:29:13

Acetylcholine, 25 microliters.

00:29:17

( alarm beeping )

00:29:19

It's not helping.

00:29:20

I'm reading massive synaptic failure.

00:29:24

This doesn't make any sense.

00:29:27

Paris to Engineering.

00:29:28

Transfer all available power to Sick Bay.

00:29:31

TORRES: Acknowledged.

00:29:33

Some kind of plasmic energy is arcing between their neural membranes.

00:29:37

That weapon...it was designed to do this.

00:29:41

To leave a residual charge in the victim's body?

00:29:43

An energy pulse that remains in the neural membranes, working its way up the spinal cord, and into the brain.

00:29:49

They'll be dead in minutes if we don't find a way to stop it.

00:29:52

I've got to protect their brain functions.

00:29:55

His neocortex is failing.

00:29:56

A spinal shunt.

00:29:58

I'll isolate the spinal cord from the brain stem... until I can repair the cellular damage.

00:30:02

But I don't have time to perform the procedure on both of them.

00:30:05

Then talk me through it.

00:30:06

We'll do them together. It's too complex.

00:30:08

Then make a choice, before we lose them both!

00:30:17

Subdermal scalpel.

00:30:18

( ominous theme playing )

00:30:27

Bioelectric field generator.

00:30:35

( monitor beeping )

00:30:37

His vital signs are stabilizing...

00:30:42

It's working.

00:30:43

Cellular regenerator.

00:30:55

His neural membranes are reestablishing themselves.

00:30:58

Good...good.

00:31:00

( flatline tone )

00:31:23

The attack... how did it end?

00:31:27

Were there more casualties?

00:31:31

We exchanged fire for another few minutes, then the aliens withdrew.

00:31:37

There was only one casualty...

00:31:40

Ensign Jetal.

00:31:45

I don't mean to seem unfeeling, but I'm programmed to accept the loss of a patient with professional detachment.

00:32:05

We are assembled here today to pay final respects to our honored dead...

00:32:10

Ensign Ahni Jetal.

00:32:12

Her intelligence and her charm have made our long journey home seem not quite so long.

00:32:19

As she continues on a journey of her own, we will keep her in our hearts... and in our memories.

00:32:36

DOCTOR: We're low on synthetic antigens, and I'm sorry to report, many of the medicinal plants you've collected over the past several months were destroyed as well.

00:32:44

I have some herbs in storage you might be able to use.

00:32:47

Been holding out on me?

00:32:48

No.

00:32:50

I was keeping them around just in case.

00:32:52

Good planning.

00:32:53

As for the antigens, I'll have to start replicating them in batches.

00:32:57

Which do you want first?

00:33:00

Decisions, decisions.

00:33:07

How do you make a decision, Mr. Neelix?

00:33:08

In general, I mean.

00:33:11

I guess I weigh the alternatives and try to decide which is best.

00:33:15

Which is best?

00:33:18

How do you determine that?

00:33:21

I never thought about it, really.

00:33:23

Well, maybe you should... think about it, I mean.

00:33:27

I guess every situation is a little different.

00:33:29

For me, it's rather simple.

00:33:31

While I'm faced with a decision, my program calculates the variables, and I take action.

00:33:36

For example, what could be simpler then a triage situation in Sick Bay?

00:33:40

Two patients, for example, both injured, for example, both in imminent danger of dying.

00:33:48

Calculate the variables.

00:33:50

My program needs to ascertain which patient has the greater chance of survival, and that's the one I treat.

00:33:59

Oh! Oh!

00:34:00

Simple.

00:34:03

But...what if they have an equal chance of survival?

00:34:09

What then?

00:34:11

Hmm?

00:34:12

Flip a coin?

00:34:14

Pick a card?

00:34:15

Doctor...

00:34:16

Oh, I'm all right.

00:34:17

I'm a hologram. I don't get injured.

00:34:19

I don't feel pain. I don't die.

00:34:21

Unlike some people I could tell you about.

00:34:25

For example, two patients, both injured, both in imminent danger of...

00:34:33

Don't touch me.

00:34:35

I'm a hologram.

00:34:36

Photonic energy. Don't waste your time.

00:34:38

Neelix to Security.

00:34:39

Send a team to the Mess Hall, please.

00:34:41

A whole team, Mr. Neelix?

00:34:44

Throwing a little party, are we?

00:34:46

Why, I attended a party just recently.

00:34:49

A birthday party for a very nice young woman.

00:34:53

I made a decision there too.

00:34:56

Several of them, in fact.

00:34:58

When I came through the door, do I turn right, or do I turn left?

00:35:02

As I recall, I decided on...the latter.

00:35:05

Then, what should I see before me, but the hors d'oeuvre tray?

00:35:08

And another decision, do I take a canapé... or refuse?

00:35:14

Oh. That's an easy one. I'm a hologram, I don't eat.

00:35:16

Something's wrong with him.

00:35:17

Don't you know it's rude to refer to somebody in the third person?

00:35:20

You had a choice, Mr. Neelix,

00:35:22

"Should I do something rude or not do something rude?"

00:35:24

Doctor, we must return to Sick Bay.

00:35:27

Why should I?

00:35:29

What if I don't want to return to Sick Bay?

00:35:31

What if I decide not to return to Sick Bay?

00:35:35

No. I don't choose this.

00:35:37

Leave me alone! Let me go!

00:35:39

Why did she have to die?

00:35:41

Why did I kill her?

00:35:42

Why did I decide to kill her? Why?

00:35:44

Somebody tell me why!

00:35:45

It was downhill from there.

00:35:48

You developed a feedback loop between your ethical and cognitive subroutines.

00:35:53

You were having the same thoughts over and over again.

00:35:56

We couldn't stop it.

00:35:58

Our only option was to erase your memories of those events.

00:36:01

You were right.

00:36:03

I didn't deserve to keep those memories... not after what I did.

00:36:07

You were performing your duty.

00:36:09

Two patients, which do I kill?

00:36:11

Doctor... Doctor? Hardly.

00:36:13

A doctor retains his objectivity.

00:36:16

I didn't do that, did I?

00:36:18

Two patients, equal chances of survival, and I chose the one I was closer to?

00:36:23

I chose my friend?

00:36:25

That's not in my programming.

00:36:26

That's not what I was designed to do!

00:36:28

Go ahead!

00:36:29

Reprogram me! I'll lend you a hand!

00:36:30

Let's start with this very day, this hour, this second!

00:36:33

Computer, deactivate the EMH.

00:36:36

( computer beeps )

00:36:40

Here we go again.

00:36:44

Captain?

00:36:46

It's as though there's a battle being fought inside him... between his original programming... and what he's become.

00:36:56

Our solution was to end that battle.

00:37:01

What if we were wrong?

00:37:03

We've seen what happens to him.

00:37:05

In fact, we've seen it twice.

00:37:07

Still...we allowed him to evolve, and at the first sign of trouble...

00:37:19

We gave him a soul, B'Elanna.

00:37:23

Do we have the right to take it away now?

00:37:26

We gave him personality subroutines.

00:37:30

I'd hardly call that a soul.

00:38:11

Captain.

00:38:13

I'm having trouble... with the nature of individuality.

00:38:18

You require a philosophical discussion.

00:38:21

There's a time and a place for it.

00:38:23

This is one of them.

00:38:28

After I freed you from the collective... you were transformed.

00:38:36

It's been a difficult process.

00:38:40

Was it worth it?

00:38:42

I had no choice.

00:38:44

That's not what I asked you.

00:38:49

If I could change what happened... erase what you did to me... would I?

00:38:59

No.

00:39:03

JANEWAY: Captain's Log, supplemental.

00:39:06

Our Doctor is now our patient.

00:39:09

It's been two weeks since I've ordered

00:39:11

a 'round-the-clock vigil.

00:39:12

A crew member has stayed with him at all times,

00:39:15

offering a sounding board and a familiar presence,

00:39:19

while he struggles to understand

00:39:21

his memories and his thoughts.

00:39:23

The chances of recovery... uncertain.

00:39:38

The more I think about it... the more I realize there's nothing I could've done differently.

00:39:47

What do you mean?

00:39:48

The primordial atom burst, sending out its radiation, setting everything in motion.

00:39:56

One particle collides with another, gases expand, planets contract, and before you know it, we've got starships and holodecks, and...chicken soup.

00:40:07

In fact, you can't help but have starships, and holodecks, and chicken soup, because it was all determined 20 billion years ago!

00:40:17

There is a certain logic to your logic.

00:40:22

Progress?

00:40:24

I'm not sure if he's making any sense of this experience, or if his program's just running in circles.

00:40:29

You've been here for 16 hours.

00:40:31

Let me continue while you rest.

00:40:34

I'll be all right.

00:40:36

Go back to the Bridge.

00:40:51

How can you read at a time like this?

00:40:53

It helps me think.

00:40:56

Think? What do you need to think about?

00:40:59

You. This book is relevant to your situation.

00:41:04

Oh? What is it?

00:41:09

Poetry...written on Earth a thousand years ago, La Vita Nuova.

00:41:16

La Vita Nuova, "The New Life"? Ha!

00:41:20

Tell that to Ensign Jetal.

00:41:23

Actually...

00:41:25

I killed her countless times.

00:41:29

What do you mean?

00:41:31

Causality, probability.

00:41:35

For every action, there's an infinite number of reactions, and in each one of them, I killed her!

00:41:46

Or did I?

00:41:52

Too many possibilities...

00:41:56

Too many pathways for my program to follow...

00:42:01

Impossible to choose...

00:42:07

Still, I...

00:42:10

I can't live with the knowledge of what I've done.

00:42:13

I can't.

00:42:17

Captain?

00:42:23

Captain? ( gasping ): Oh, sorry.

00:42:25

How could you sleep at a time like this?

00:42:28

Well, it's been a long day.

00:42:29

You were saying...?

00:42:30

What's wrong?

00:42:32

Nothing.

00:42:34

You're ill. I have a headache.

00:42:35

Fever. You have a fever. I'll live.

00:42:38

Medical emergency! Doctor...

00:42:39

Someone's got to treat you immediately.

00:42:41

Call Mr. Paris. You've got to get to Sick Bay!

00:42:44

Doctor...

00:42:46

I'm a little busy right now... helping a friend.

00:42:56

I...I'll be all right.

00:43:00

Go. Sleep. Please.

00:43:04

I'll still be here in the morning.

00:43:06

Sure?

00:43:09

Yes. Please.

00:43:12

I don't want to be responsible for any more suffering.

00:43:33

Good night.

00:43:35

If you need anything...

00:43:37

I'll call.

00:43:38

Thank you, Captain.

00:44:22

In that book, which is my memory...

00:44:29

On the first page of the chapter,

00:44:32

that is the day when I first met you...

00:44:38

Appear the words, "Here begins a new life."

00:45:07

( title theme plays )